Recent favorites from youtube.

Easily one of the funniest scenes on the Office in it's 5 seasons. Believe me, I have watched every episode and this scene just killed my sides.


And this guy is rad.

No, no, THIS is my blog.

http://checkoutthisshit.blogspot.com/


lol, blog nerds rule.

Check me get choked.

Aaron Neville can't stop loving you.

I have a secret.

It's no big deal.

It's just....


I really like Aaron Neville. Well, not in the way I like boobies or the far more relevant Buddy Rich, but I like him because of that killer voice. It's not like Sinatra though. Put it this way, Aaron Neville rocks because every time I hear him sing I want to imitate the falcetto vibrato and I always laugh out loud because that man's voice is ri-god damn-diculous. One of my favorite Family Guy clips is when Peter uses an Aaron Neville bullhorn and it makes Peter's voice into the Neville. Yes. The Neville.

Moving on.
Jiu Jitsu! Mouth guards. Who ever invented the mouth guard deserves and honorary Nobel prize because that shit is fucking genius! I took an accidental knee to the chin yesterday. Ray, a blue belt from my school and I were rolling and he moved as I moved and his knee caught my chin. It happens. I sat back, took a second, thank the maker of mouth guards and took a water break. I was fine though. A liiiiittle upset I didn't get a bruise out of it but there will be many more bruises in the future. I am learning a lot, losing fat, gaining muscle, all that shit. It's pretty sweet. I hit sort of a wall in Jiu Jitsu though the other night. Todd was showing Donald and I a sweep and I just couldn't get the motion right. Eventually my leg started cramping so I finished up, by then I had been rolling for almost two hours anyway. I'll get it. I give people a hard time. I am a lot of man to move around so people like to train with me. From what I can tell, it isn't very often someone regularly trains jiu jitsu and is 6'6" 250. They welcome the opportunity and it helps me improve as well. Todd says he is impressed and thinks I will be very "dangerous" after a year or so of training. Let's do it.

Softball. It's frustrating to lose to a team which was 0-7 and is the same team which prays before the game, shouts "one-two-three, JESUS!" before the game, then invites the other team to pray with them. Everyone holds hands in the middle of the field and they pray. I did a vlog about it



I assume they pray. I have never gone over there and I never will. But man do I hate losing to these guys. They have some BIG ASSHOLES on their team. Guys arguing with the umpire about calls. I told them to "FORGIVE the ump." I don't think anyone got it. Maybe I didn't say it loud enough. Damn. The shitty part is that the umpire called the game one inning short. We finished the 6th, were down by TWO runs and he called the game on TIME. Can you believe that shit? Give us ten friggin' more minutes. So yea, we lost to the the Jesus team and I hate losing to the Jesus team. If they didn't do the whole prayer thing on the field, I wouldn't give a shit. PLUS, these assholes stack their team. Different people every time we play them, newer and faster guys. It's retarded. What ever. I still have fun and I looove playing with the Buds. The one team in the league where the same members play every week and only have one or two regular subs. It's the shit.

I've been watching a lot of Flight of the Conchords, lately. I particularly enjoy Jemaine's David Bowie impressions. Fuckin genius.


I had a fun little moment at work today. I was delivering in an industrial area, where there aren't a lot of cars but you come across lots of trucks and people walking. It's good to walk. Well today as I was delivering in one of the Postal trucks there was a woman running. I totally checked out her ass while I drove behind her but wasn't obviously slowing down or anything. Not creepy, just, you know....looking. Anyway, I pass her and get to the second box. I take a while to get the lock to work and she jogs passed. Very cute, dressed for a good run, only a few minutes into it I would guess. So she ran passed, got about 30 feet away when I finished with the box and moved on. I passed her, again, looking but this time as I passed I lined up the rear view just right and flshed her the mirror smile. She got it, smiled back, and I pulled to the next box but this time she was getting close so I started to obviously rush the mail into the box and pull away, the whole time keeping an eye on her to make sure she didn't pass me. I pulled out and started laughing really loudly and sort of like an evil genius, then I had to stop again, she caught up again and passed me but this time as I went by I shouted, "I am gonna win!" and she laughed. I got to the box and put the mail in, she ran by and I had to make a u-turn. I honked and waved and as she ran away she turned around, smiled really big and waved. There was just something really fun about the interaction and it would be cool if she was out there again on Thursday when I do that route. Maybe I'll slow down and have a chat this time, or run her off the road. Hmmmmm, which should it be?

My snake escaped tonight. I didn't even notice until she was climbing in my bass drum. It was funny. Sneaky little bitch.

ENOUGH!

I know why blogs fail.

Because you don't know if anyone is reading or not. Well, I don't know of a way to know, other than comments. So leaving comments helps. Or I can just blog and not give a hoot. :-)

It seems the people have power still. I had voiced my boycott of Viacom a few weeks ago when they demanded personal information (IP address mainly) from YouTube and the viewing habits of each individual. It was a really big threat to privacy so the youtube community came out and screamed and hollered and sure enough, Viacom backed down and they came to a pretty reasonable agreement. Go look it up if you are interested. It's good for us to investigate.

The Hyphen

Okay, what's the deal with people hyphenating their last name when they get married? Yea, yea, I get the whole feminist movement and not wanted to be submissive and shit but let's get real. What happens when you have children? They get a hyphenated name...THEN, when they grow up, what happens? They marry someone else who then hyphenates they hyphenated name so you end up with someone with three or even four last names! This is why you should either just keep your friggin name or take the name of your spouse. I am not saying women should take the man's name, I am just saying you should choose one or the other because this whole hyphenating thing is a slippery slope to a future of people with eight last names.

Sometimes you come across a video...

and just wanna share it with the world. He disabled embedding, so here is the link....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBS_J2JPbDs&feature=related

A very funny video.

When there is a storm, learn to dance in the rain.

Great advice, dad.

Today I got the call that I would not be considered on a job for which I had applied. Getting this job would have solved so many of my problems. Financially I would be out of debt in months, I would have been able to afford a new car, could afford to do jiu jitsu three times a week, could move out, save for college, etc. Unfortunately all of those problems will have to hang onto my back for a while longer.

Thankfully I have the best dad ever. He said the subject quote. I had to tell him me doing Jiu Jitsu is me dancing in the rain. It's amazing. I went to class feeling bummed about everything, rolled for an hour and a half, had some great rolls and now I feel a million times better. Not a worry in my mind. My only concern is when to wake up tomorrow and how much to drink. A lot or a little? Hmmm, gonna have to sit on that for awhile.

Until then,
enjoy your evening. Try to get drunk, laid or both. Whatever you do, make sure you are smiling.

Garrett

LAD 5 HA 2

Yes, we win again. That's two series in a row won, 6 of 8 games won, doing very well and enjoying having some victories to watch. Watching any sport in which you root for a given side is frustrating when they play like donkey nuts. When they play well, it's a wonderful past time.

It's nice having the house to myself. The folks, yes, sadly I live at home again, have been in Utah for a week and a half now, no doubt having a blast doing practically nothing. It leaves me with a kitchen to myself, a whole yard to care for and the freedom to host WEC marathons and balls games without hesitation. It's not like they wouldn't mind if I did that sort of thing when they are here, but it just isn't prudent to bring the riff raff I associate with into this house while my parents are here. That being said it's not like I have been throwing ragers. I've only had a couple visitors so far, which is still nice.

You should see/eat the breakfasts I have been making in the mornings. Today was Farmer John thick cut bacon, FJ sausage patties, eggos, three eggs over medium, hash browns and a big glass of milk. Did I mention how delicious Aunt Jemima maple syrup is on eggos and sausage? Fuggetabouit. That has been my standard breakfast. It's so odd how much better I eat when I am alone. I guess I feel less obligated to make food for everyone when I can just make it on my own time. I eat at different times than my folks and my dad will literally eat anything that is in the fridge. The other day he tried to get me to eat some ground beef from April! Gross.

Another thing I enjoy is caring for the tortoises how I want to. I may steal the responsibility from mom because I feel I have more loving touch to caring for them. I feed them more often, by hand to make sure they all eat, and water them FAR more often. I don't think I ever see my parents watering the tortoises. Just because they are desert tortoises, doesn't mean they don't need water. Plus I think feeding them bananas gives them Diarrhea, have to do some research on that one.

More Jiu Jitsu tonight. I did some good working out and stretching on my off days so I am looking forward to rolling tonight. I am also excited to give my teacher and his family the delicious lasagna I made them. Their mother/wife has just had surgery so I thought since she would be out of commission, and since Todd doesn't strike me as a cook I would make them a big lasagna. It is one of my better ones, I would love to eat it myself but I am proud to be giving it to them. I am sure they will enjoy it. I even double checked with Ben to make sure no one had any issues with beef or cheese, but with my experience one of them will be deathly allergic to tomatoes...I sure hope that's not the case. haha

Independence day tomorrow. As always I worry about the Irony of another "terrorist" attack and the Presidential issuance of martial law, but I doubt it will happen. The more I watch conspiracy theorists and get to understand the mentality of the front runners of these theories the more I feel like I am associating myself with lunatics. Aliens? Satanists? The occult? Inbreeding sociopaths? Well the last part is true but when these assholes start using 9/11 as evidence for the coming of revelations I just have to bury my head in my hands then punch myself in the face six or seven times. I need to just stick to doing my own research, forming my own thoughts and not buying into so much of the stuff people put on the internet. Spin and propaganda works two ways these days, and both sides are batshit crazy.

Well, I am going to end here. Gotta get cleaned up from washing my car so I can visit with grandma and grandpa before class. It's been nice visiting with them a couple days a week, considering how little I have seen them in recent years. It's also nice to see my bud Harley once a week. He needs good role models so I do my best to be one.

Anywho...


Peace out,
G

LAD 4 HA 1 W: H. Kuroda (4-6, 3.73); L: R. Hernandez (0-2, 5.40) HR: LAD: A. Ethier (8). HOU: C. Lee (19).

GO DODGERS!!!!!!

Another day, another....

Well, I would say another dollar had I actually worked today. It is so frustrating to work at a place where they don't care about your comfort or whether you can pay your bills or not. I am inches from telling them to go fuck themselves. It almost seems more worth it to work at the Gap or some shitty place than to work for the United States Postal Service; careless assholes. I have asked numerous times for more work, obviously asked on deaf ears and blind eyes and no sense of humanity. These are the same people who tell 54 year old workers they are no longer fit for service, thus disqualifying them for any retirement or accumulated sick leave. It's quite unfair, and a little bit sickening.

Despite my lack of work, and lack of money I am still feeling much better than I was a few months ago. Brazilian Jiu Jitsu has been life changing. I feel inspired by the people I train with, I am seeing the weight melt off like hot butter, I stopped smoking cigarettes, I barely smoke weed anymore and twice a week I am able to release any pent up aggression on some other poor white belt weighing 50 pounds less and about a foot shorter. I say that in jest, I truly enjoy training, and every opponent is a challenge. It is the act of straining, moving, thinking, sweeping and maneuvering for an hour and a half, which gives my mind and body the stress relieving exercise it needs. It sort of takes my mind off the fact that my work could care less about me, and reminds my body that I am much stronger than I think I am.

That's another thing. I feel so much more confident in myself now that I do Jiu Jitsu. Knowing there is no one who can physically dominate me changes everything. For men, the only reason we don't speak our mind in a stressful situation is because we fear confrontation, don't let anyone lie and tell you differently. So when a man possesses a certain strength and knowledge of self-defense and physical dominance avoiding confrontation doesn't seem as important. If I don't like how it is, I will say so. Why? Because the worst you could do is try and fight me and there is no way you will beat me up. I may not beat you up, but you definitely won't beat me up. It's that simple. Only a month in, and the change is obvious.

Woman are still not so easy to be confident with. Yes, I feel more confident, but it doesn't change that I feel so invasive, sleazy or, pardon the inventive word, douchebaggy (See hotchickswithdouchebags blog). Time and again I make an attempt to strike up honest conversation with an attractive woman and somehow I manage to come off as a dirtbag, or that is the way it seems. There are a few scenarios here...

We talk briefly, get along well, friends take her away.

We talk briefly, she acts uninterested, I leave because I don't play that game.

We talk briefly, she acts like a bitch and I tell her to go fuck herself. This one is more fun because I would rather those women never talk to me again.

We talk briefly, she is more interested in one of my friends.

We talk briefly, boyfriend takes her away like an asshole, dogging me all the way.

I don't think I have ever gotten a phone number from a friendly interaction at a public place. That thought is a little depressing but I won't let it bring me down. I know that I have a lot to offer and women who don't see it aren't really worth the time. I am aware that I live in Bimboton, CA and the standards are based on women who used to date men who ran in a group called J.O.X.; how brilliant can they be?

So perhaps I need a change of scenery? Perhaps I need a new approach? I am not going to worry about it. I think the most important thing for me to do is maintain my current position, train hard in BJJ and keep finding a good job so I might pay off my debt and begin to apply for Graduate School. BJJ really fixes me. I can't explain it, it is just an equalizer that is essential to

I will blog some other time about graduate school.

Yesterday's game: LAD 7 HA 6, 11th inning BOMB from Jeff Kent took us to victory. Gotta love when that sort of stuff happens.

Till next time,
I'm Ron Burgundy. You stay classy, Internet.

Well here it is

My blog. I started this because Warren inspired me. Ramblinwa to be more precise. I think I will come here now and then to write about what I do, what I don't do and what I would like to do but haven't done and the various reasons for that being.

For now, I think I will leave this here and go into the world, seeking material for my new blog.

Cheers.